It can be undeniably painful to leave your partner, yet some people aren’t compatible and don’t always want the same or have similar goals. Or worse, some relationships are toxic to mental health, if not bordering on dangerous. Here are a few signs to help you know when it’s time to walk away.
1. Leave your partner if there is violence or abuse
This is a no-brainer, but it’s time to leave your partner if you feel unsafe or notice violent tendencies. Moreover, mental abuse can be equally dangerous, and it’s also something to remember if you think you want to leave your partner. This includes how the relationship impacts your self-esteem.
2. Leave your partner if they’re a distraction
It isn’t healthy, nor do you become a productive person on a mission to reach your goals if your relationship and partner don’t motivate you to grow. If they instead talk you out of your goals or derail them, you’re better off without them, so you don’t wake up one day to regret missing out on your hopes and dreams.
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3. If They Exhaust You
While relationships face challenges and it’s impossible to be happy all the time, you should feel energized, excited, supported, and happy most of the time. It’s time to leave your partner if you feel exhausted and unhappy in their presence.
4. Leave Your Partner if They Cheat
Cheating is one of the easiest ways to lose trust in someone. It causes doubts and insecurities, and the other person will always question their partner’s true intentions. As such, it’s time to leave your partner if they cheat regularly or even once, depending on your guidelines for ethics. Either way, those with open communication and mutual trust and respect are the safest, happiest, and healthiest relationships.
5. Leave Your Partner if You Always Argue
Like feeling drained or exhausted by our partners, arguments do happen from time to time. However, they shouldn’t be your main form of communication. Otherwise, it’s time to move on.
6. If Counseling isn’t an Option
Another sign that it may be time to leave your partner is if they refuse to go to counseling or therapy. While you don’t have to do that if you don’t feel there is a problem, knowing that your partner is willing to do what it takes to make the relationship work is incredibly reassuring and reinforces a positive outlook on the relationship.
7. Children and Pets are Number 1
It’s a major red flag for the health of a relationship if one partner doesn’t accept the other’s children or pets. While some circumstances like trauma or allergies may be an exception, it’s problematic if your partner refuses to accept your pets or children, because they are some of the most important beings in your life and it’s ideal they all get along so you never feel stuck in the middle or resentful.
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8. Emotional Blackmail is Painful and Unsettling
Your partner may threaten to leave, cheat, or end the relationship as a defense mechanism during an argument. However, it’s unsettling, scary, and considered a form of emotional abuse. Leave your partner if they choose this method for “solving problems.”
9. You no longer feel emotionally connected
Perhaps one of the hardest reasons to leave your partner is because you no longer feel attached to them. You may find it painful to hurt them and it’s difficult to explain that things have changed because more often than not, there isn’t a way to pinpoint how or why things have changed which might confuse both people. However, people need to be honest with one another, including having difficult or painful conversations.
10. Different Goals
You should leave your partner if you have differing goals that don’t align. You’ll likely never see eye to eye or agree about what to do with time off, extra money, or many other plans involved in sharing a life.
In contrast, you may not want to leave your partner if your relationship has most or all of these elements.
- Honesty
- Open communication
- Mutual Respect
- Compromise from both parties
- Support and Encouragement
- Goals that are similar or align
It’s a painful and difficult process to leave your partner. However, it can be the best option especially if you have kids, and often there’s animosity within the home. Sadly, love alone isn’t enough to make a relationship work. Both parties must be on the same or a similar page, headed in the same direction.
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Sources
- “10 Reasons to Leave a Relationship.” Psychology Today. Barton Goldsmith. September 17, 2012.
- “Should You Break Up With Your Partner? 9 Signs To End The Relationship And 5 Signs To Stay, Per Experts.” Women’s Health Mag. Tianna Soto. September 2, 2023.
