Pregnancy is a huge deal for any expectant mother, especially if it is her first child. She may have read all the books about what to expect when you’re expecting and even taken part in classes about labor, breathing, and breastfeeding. However, nothing will stop the irrational fear that somehow you’ll do something wrong and harm your baby. Thankfully there is a long list of dos and don’ts for a pregnant woman that most women take very seriously. Unfortunately for an anonymous man on Reddit, his pregnant wife takes it a little too seriously.
A pregnant wife refuses to do any housework
He wanted to find out if he was being unreasonable for wanting his pregnant wife to help out with the household chores. He explains that he is doing his best as a husband and loves his wife and unborn child more than anything else. But, he works full time and then comes home to take over all the chores. Cooking, cleaning, and pet care all fall to him while his pregnant wife spends her days taking it easy and relaxing.
On a few occasions, he has tried to get her to help because he was feeling “burnt out.” But she refused every time.
“She says that it would stress her out and possibly harm the baby, which scared me, I didn’t want anything to happen to our baby, so I didn’t push it, despite the fact that I’ve been catering to her every need for 6 months”Reddit
During the earliest hours of the morning, his wife woke him demanding snacks. Understandably he politely said no, but after half an hour of begging, he simply couldn’t take it anymore. She began to cry and insult him, calling him names and telling him he is a terrible husband.
“I would hate to see what kind of father you’ll be if this is how selfish you are to the mother of your child,” she said to her husband.
This caused him to lose his temper and scream that while she was sitting on her phone every day, not lifting a finger to help, he has taken on 100% of the responsibility for the chores and upkeep. She did not like that and kicked him out of their bedroom and made him sleep on the sofa. He would later receive text messages from his in-laws calling him nasty names.
What people think about his pregnant wife
The majority of those on Reddit who responded to his thread reflect the same sentiment. They agree he is not being unreasonable and that his wife is the one being unfair.
“Most women stay at work for 6 months and beyond into their pregnancy,” said one comment. With another saying, “Unless it is a high risk, your wife can do chores while carrying the child. You’re being manipulated and taken advantage of”
A mother of four commented; “I’ve been pregnant four times, all high risk, and not once did my doctor tell me not to do regular household chores, in fact, it was encouraged as it kept me active and helped reduce any stress I had”
What to do and not to
Cooking: As long as she does not have to stay on her feet for too long, this should be easy.
Sweeping and Mopping: These two tasks do not take up a lot of energy and should be easy to do within a few minutes.
Cleaning: Provided she not use extremely toxic chemicals, a pregnant woman is able to do light cleaning.
Washing up: Laundry and the dishes are both generally very quick to do if you don’t allow the pile to grow too large.
Lifting: It is unwise to put your pregnant body under that kind of stress. Organs inside your body have been shifted around and are taking the strain.
Climbing: During pregnancy, most pregnant women will gain a significant amount of weight. This can be difficult to work with, especially if you are not used to it. Not to mention water retention!
Pet-care: Avoid animal poops at all costs. Cat litter especially.
Housework can be a great way to stay active during pregnancy. Also, it can even be fun if you and your partner do it together because as they say, many hands make light work.
- “AITA for refusing to get my pregnant wife fruit snacks and demanding she do more chores?” Reddit. February 24th, 2021
- “Household Work During Pregnancy – What to Do and What to Avoid.” Parenting. Aparna. February 8, 2018.