In general, grandparents are usually pretty excited when they find out their kids are having children. After all, being a grandparent can be quite fun: You get to enjoy the kids without having to do much of the hard parenting stuff. Sometimes, however, young parents can take advantage of this and treat grandparents like babysitters. Clearly, this woman asked her mom to babysit one too many times, which resulted in a four-minute rant about how raising her daughter’s children wasn’t her job.
The mom posted the video on YouTube, which sparked quite the debate online about how extensive the grandparent’s role in child-rearing should be.
Parents Should Not Treat Grandparents Like Babysitters
In December 2019, new mom Quayla Ann posted a video of her mother ranting about how millennials shouldn’t treat grandparents like babysitters. The emotionally charged speech came shortly after the young woman had asked her mom to babysit, presumably one too many times. The grandmother did not hold back about her opinions on grandparent childminding duties, telling her daughter that this younger generation has it very backward.
“Because I became a grandparent does not automatically make me the babysitter or a daycare,” she states. (1)
She goes on to explain that grandparents have already done their job raising their own children. If they did their job right, then they raised children who have the financial means to support their own herd. This means being able to pay for daycare and childcare when necessary.
“No it ain’t supposed to be dropping them off when you want to … No! … It don’t go like that. You know why? Because we already had our life with raising kids,” she explains. “We aren’t supposed to be tied down raising [your] kids. We’re supposed to be gardening, going to the senior citizen’s place, bingo … That’s what we raise you all for, to be able to take care of your kids,” (1)
She says that in a healthy parent-grandparent relationship, the grandparent is able to take the kids when they want to. They are not the go-to option for free childcare, so don’t treat grandparents like babysitters.
“True grandparents are supposed to be able to call their grandkids. Y’all supposed to come over and visit,” she said. (1)
The Internet’s Response
Most people commenting agreed with the grandmother in the video. They all expressed a similar sentiment: That they had already raised their kids. If you decide to have children, it’s your job to raise them yourself.
“She is trying to say: Don’t have kids if you don’t want to put your full time into taking care of them, you make a baby you take care of it.” wrote one commenter.
“I absolutely agree with this grandma. She did her job already. She raised her own kids. She doesn’t have to raise grandchildren.” wrote another. (1)
Others commented on how they are appalled by what the daughter says, as well as how another woman in the background, were laughing. The older woman was clearly upset. Laughing was just another sign of the lack of respect.
“I hate the fact that they’re just laughing at her. God, this Grandma deserves some respect” said one person. (1)
There were a few who mentioned the privilege of being able to be such a foundational part of children’s lives. Those comments, however, were relatively overwhelming by those in support of the grandmother.
“AMEN!! WE RAISED Y’ALL UP, WE ARE TRIED! THAT DON’T MEAN WE DON’T LOVE Y’ALL ! WE LOVE OUR GRAND CHILDREN, LET US WATCH THEM ON OUR TIME BECAUSE WE HAVE A LIFE!” by one commenter pretty much sums it up. (1)
What do you think? How extensive should the grandparents’ role be in raising their grandchildren? Should parents treat grandparents like babysitters?
- “Grandmas are not obligated to babysit.” Youtube. Quayla Ann. December 30, 2019.