When we marry, we marry our partner’s families as well, the good, the bad, and the downright right sneaky. Sometimes we get lucky and find a partner with a great family team behind them. A good support system that only adds to our new life together. But, could you imagine marrying someone, having a baby with them, and then their mother literally changes the newborn’s name?
Jennifer Lopez and Jane Fonda were in a movie together called “Monster-in-law,” which has since become a common phrase to describe a particularly manipulative, petty, and vindictive mother-in-law. The following story sounds like it is lifted straight from the pitch-meeting for that movie. The mother-in-law (MIL) changes the newborn’s name behind her daughter-in-law’s back.
Mother-in-law changes newborn’s name
To properly sort and file her new baby’s documentation, a new mother discovers that her newborn son has had the spelling of his name changed. As any parent can tell you, choosing a name is an incredibly special and private decision. So, when someone changes a newborn’s name, the mother would naturally be angry.
The mother would come to find out that her mother-in-law had secretly conspired to have the newborn’s first name changed. The MIL ended up settling on changing the middle name instead when her husband finally caved and allowed it to happen.
“I, of course, am furious, because I told him I was fine with the middle name but only if it was spelt, Finley, and he agreed before our son was ever born.”
She went on to say that her husband’s mother originally wanted to changes newborn’s name to something that she, the mother, did not like at all! But, after some serious guilt-tripping the father gave in and allowed her to change newborns name.
“She once sent a Christmas gift for the baby with his name misspelt and my husband said it wasn’t a big deal.”[1]
Changes newborn’s name – all behind her back
The mother-in-law in question lives a few states away and cannot see the baby as much as she wanted. Perhaps it was because she wanted to assert her dominance. Or, maybe she was just bored? No one really knows exactly why she leads this elaborate scheme. She explained that “Finlay” was more masculine than “Finley.”
Apparently, the husband had been on the phone with his mother for weeks. All while she tried to convince him to change the newborn’s name. But, he knew that changing the first name would be too much. So, his mother settled for changing a single letter in the middle name. She ensured that it was changed on all his legal documentation. It took the mom about two weeks until she noticed the name change.
Her husband says that he regrets his decision to go behind her back, but he claims that he did not want to upset his mother or wife. Also, he thought that this would be a good compromise. His mother said that his wife would get over it.[2]
The puppet master
“I always knew she didn’t like me but to so blatantly disrespect me and the name my husband and I had chosen for our son. I really think she put his whole name in his Christmas gift as a jab to me, knowing I would see it. She manipulated my husband into thinking it was all right to lie to me about something as serious as the spelling of our son’s name.”
The relationship between the mother and mother-in-law is fragile, to say the least. The husband tried to keep the peace while his mother manipulated him into changing the newborn’s name. Of course, the mother is still distraught and will be changing the name legally as soon as she can.
“My husband is very much at fault for doing this in the first place and we are working through it together, but I feel as though something needs to be said to my mother-in-law.”
She goes on to say that she has no desire to have any kind of relationship with her mother-in-law. And, moving forward, She is not at all worried about playing nice.
Keep Reading: Mother Who Spent 47 Years Caring For Her Son Wished He Wasn’t Born.
Sources
- “Mother-In-Law Secretly Changes Baby’s Name While Mom Recovers From C-Section.” The Bump. Stephanie Grassullo. February 2019.
- “Mother-In-Law Secretly Changes Newborn Grandson’s Name While His Mother Recovers From C-Section.” Shared. Zauva C. January 3, 2020