woman in labour
Jade Small
Jade Small
December 5, 2023 ·  4 min read

Mom’s Friends ‘Disgusted’ After She Tells Husband To Save Her Life Over The Baby’s During Birth

Having a baby comes with so many decisions. There’s more to having a child than simply choosing a name and color scheme for the nursery. Have you ever thought about if there were any complications with your pregnancy? Would you ask your husband to choose your life over the baby’s? This woman asked Reddit what they thought when she asked her partner to save her life over the baby’s and shared her friends’ negative reactions [1].

Since this story is not verifiable, we don’t know if the story is true or not. Regardless, it’s still a topic of discussion that we think is important! How would you act in this situation? There are no easy answers.

This woman was shamed for asking her husband to save her life over the baby’s

Her Reddit post, is as follows:

This woman was shamed for asking her husband to save her life over the baby’s
Image Credit: u/Aithana | Reddit

The Reddit post blew up and most people agreed with the woman

Her question on Reddit went viral, gathering nearly 3000 comments. Tons of support came pouring in, agreeing with her that it was the right choice to save her life over the baby’s.

You can make another baby, there can’t be another you.”

I had a similar conversation with my husband once and that was exactly what he said to me. I would never want him to be miserable with a baby by himself. I’m not scared of dying or anything, but I do want to live and be by his side now and when we decide to have our children. Of course, we’d be devasted if we lost a baby, but we would go through it all together.

Reddit – likasanches

This. During both my pregnancies we were in agreement that if the unthinkable would happen then I was the one with priority. Doubly more so the second time because neither of us could fathom leaving our oldest and a newborn motherless.

We figured we can make another baby, or adopt one. If I won’t be able to carry again, but we can’t make another me.

Reddit – MsMoongoose

Many of those commenting said they felt her friends were the problem with modern parenting.

I hate the modern parenting culture where mothers are expected to always martyr themselves, where her health and her needs are totally ignored in favor of the baby. It’s dehumanizing. There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to live.

Reddit – tourmaline82

Agreed. It’s like the martyr Olympics. I’ve seen a group of this type of mother almost come to blows over who was most willing to sacrifice her life in horrible ways for the sake of her kids. They were trying to one-up each other over what they’d be willing to suffer. To be honest it was fascinating in a morbid horrifying way.

NTA OP. You’re a person with value in your own right. My feeling is someone who exists now has priority. Sacrificing yourself while making your husband a widower & your child motherless is not the noble action your “friends” seem to think it is.

Reddit – jethrine

This woman shared her story of how they had experienced being in the hospital. And, the medical staff had chosen to save her life over the baby’s.

I lived through the situation. We didn’t get a choice. The doctor just point blank said, “if it comes down to you or the baby, we save you.”. Luckily, we both made it out ok. I think this is mostly just an old troupe from movies and TV. But I agree, OP is NTA.

Reddit – go_Raptors

Another poster shared how the thread had put his mind at ease about choosing to save her life over the baby’s, if she was ever in that situation.

This whole thing has been a fascinating read. I remember once years ago this topic came up, in a largely female group. And, the opinion was very heavily that ‘of course you’d save the baby’. That always stuck with me.

I’m at the point of starting a family soon. My wife has various medical issues which may make a pregnancy slightly harder than the norm. Something happening to her is my worst fear in the whole thing. (to the point I argued for not having kids rather than risk it). And, I’ve always been very, very clear in my mind that if that horrible, horrible decision ever came up. I’d pick her in a heartbeat.

While the loss of a baby would undoubtedly be heartbreaking. As long as she’s around, we could always have another. (even if she lost the ability to have her own there’d still be options as a couple). The other choice would leave me a heartbroken single parent. And I can’t imagine it being much of a life for me or the kid.

Reddit – Tristavius

Keep Reading: Airline Didn’t Let Dad And Newborn On Plane, So Kind Stranger Took Them Home

Sources:

  1. AITA For telling my husband that if he had to choose between my self and my daughter during birth to choose me? Reddit.