The longest-married presidential couple, former president Jimmy Carter and his wife Rosalynn have been married for 75 years. This is how they met and their secret to still be in love with each other so many decades later.
Jimmy Carter and Wife Rosalynn’s Secret To A Long-Lasting Marriage
Jimmy Carter and his wife Rosalynn are one of the longest-married presidential couples in history, having been married now for 75 years. Now both in their 90s, they’ve certainly got a lot of wisdom as to how to make a marriage last for so many decades and still be so in love with each other. This is especially considering that their marriage lasted through such a high-profile and high-stress job as being the president of the United States of America. (1)
Small Town Sweethearts
Jimmy Carter and Eleanor Rosalynn both grew up in the 1920s and 30s in the small town of Plains, Georgia. They didn’t just grow up in the same town, in fact, Jimmy’s mother helped deliver baby Rosalynn. The first time Jimmy saw his future wife was when his mom brought him over at just three years old to see the newly born baby. They were neighbors and Rosalynn was a good friend of Jimmy’s younger sister. (2)
The Carter family did reasonably well for themselves, with Jimmy’s father being a successful businessman and his mother a hard-working nurse. Rosalynn’s family, however, was hit much harder by the Great Depression, especially when her father died at just 13 years old. She began working at a young age to help her mother support their family. Despite this, she was still a top student.
Young Romance
Though they knew each other their whole lives, it wasn’t until 1945 when they began to show interest in each other. Rosalynn was a freshman at the Georgia Institute of Technology. Jimmy was attending the U.S. Naval Academy in Annapolis, Maryland, but was home on a visit. Rosalynn thought Jimmy looked very handsome in his Navy uniform, and Jimmy took quick notice of the pretty, quiet 17-year-old.
While home for the summer one night, Jimmy was supposed to be going on a date with another girl, but those plans fell through. He spotted his sister and Rosalynn walking down the street and impulsively invited Rosalynn to the movies instead. It was on that date that they had their first kiss and Jimmy reportedly told his mother that he had met his future wife. That winter Jimmy proposed, however, Rosalynn said no. He refused to give up, and the couple eventually got engaged in the spring. They were married on July 7, 1946.
The Early Years
Of course, Jimmy Carter being a Naval officer meant that he and Rosalynn moved quite often. They lived and had their first four children in Norfolk, Virginia. From there, they lived in Hawaii, Pennsylvania, Connecticut, Pennsylvania again, Massachusetts, before finally establishing more firm roots in New York state. When Jimmy’s father died in 1953, however, he decided he needed to return home to Plains to help run the family’s business, including the peanut farm. Rosalynn loved her life in New York and was extremely unhappy at first. This was the first real hardship in their relationship.
Rosalynn said she was convinced that the best part of her life was over. An intelligent, independent woman, she struggled to find equal footing with her husband. Eventually, she began helping Jimmy run the farm and took over its finances. She was the reason the business truly began turning a profit.
Jimmy Carter’s Political Career
Jimmy Carter first won a seat in the Georgia State Senate in 1962. He became the governor of Georgia in 1970, thanks to Rosalynn who, despite her shy nature, tirelessly campaigned for him across the state. As the first lady of Georgia, Rosalynn had the opportunity to work on causes that meant a lot to her, including mental health. She has been a champion for these causes ever since.
When Jimmy announced he was running for president in 1976, his campaign took the couple across the country. After his win, the couple and their youngest daughter moved into the White House. For the first time in history, Rosalynn as the First Lady became a close advisor to her husband, now the President of the United States. She had her own office in the East Wing, sat in on Cabinet meetings, advised staffing and personnel, and served as an envoy on overseas trips.
“Because Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter had such a close, personal relationship inside their marriage,” says author and Carter biographer Jonathan Alter. “closer by a lot than Eleanor and Franklin (Roosevelt) or Bill and Hillary (Clinton). This gave Rosalynn Carter unparalleled influence over her husband’s decisions. We never saw anything like it before Jimmy Carter was president, and we haven’t seen it since.” (3)
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Post-Politics
After Jimmy’s time as president, they moved back to Plains where they continued to do their humanitarian work. It wasn’t all smooth sailing, however. Jimmy’s 2015 cancer diagnosis was a scary one for the couple, however, one that brought them closer together.
“Over the years, we became not only friends and lovers, but partners,” Rosalynn said at Jimmy’s 90th birthday celebration. “He has always thought I could do anything, and because of that, I/we have had some wonderful adventures and challenges.”
Once, in an interview with Playboy Magazine, the interviewer asked Jimmy if he had ever committed adultery. Jimmy responded by quoting a bible verse: “I tell you that anyone who looks on a woman with lust in his heart has already committed adultery.” He then explained that he had for certain done that throughout his marriage. This, however, was the only kind of “adultery” he had ever partaken in.
The Secret To Their Success
So what’s the couple’s secret to a long-lasting marriage filled with love and admiration for each other? Both Jimmy and Rosalynn say it’s space. They have a variety of past times and things they enjoy doing together, but they also give one another the space to do their own thing. Not one person and their wants or needs are more important than the others. It never was, and it never will be.
“We’ve had a kind of policy on which we’ve agreed,” Jimmy Carter says. “We give each other plenty of space to do our own things. And we try to find things we like to do together, and we try to concentrate on them. We took up downhill skiing when I was 62 years old. She was 59. We’ve taken up bird-watching and playing tennis and fly-fishing. So we’ve got a lot of common things we do together.”
They also say they do their best to never go to bed angry or upset with each other. They have disagreements and arguments all the time, but they always try to overcome them before going to sleep.
So there you have it, the secrets to a long-lasting, loving relationship. Support one another’s goals, needs, and desires. Never go to bed angry. Always give each other space to be an individual while also finding things you enjoy doing together.
Related: Jimmy Carter, 96, Gushes About Wife Rosalynn, 93, Ahead Of 75th Wedding Anniversary Celebration
Sources
- “Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter’s Love Story: From Small Town Sweethearts to the White House.” Biography. Barbara Maranzani. March 2, 2021.
- “Inseparable.” Washington Post
- “Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter Share Secrets to 75-year Marriage.” VOA News. Kane Farabaugh. July 6, 2021.