mother and son baking
Jade Small
Jade Small
April 16, 2024 ·  3 min read

‘Boy moms’ called out for dubious logic behind teaching their sons to cook

In the ever-evolving social media trends, the emergence of the “Boy Moms” movement on TikTok has been both heartwarming and transformative. Challenging traditional gender roles and societal norms, this trend empowers mothers to teach their sons essential life skills such as cooking and cleaning. They do not want their sons to expect this from their future wives or girlfriends. “Boy Moms” are paving the way for a generation that values partnership and collaboration. However, some mothers have taken this to heart, saying their intentions do not seem in everyone’s best interest. A debate has sparked between the parents of the internet.

Boy Moms Raising Independent Sons

In the old days, women were expected to manage the household while their husbands worked. This meant waking up early to prepare the kids for school, packing lunches, cleaning the house, grocery shopping, and cooking every meal. It became a chore, as opposed to collaborative living. However, as the modern world progresses, we see more people sharing these tasks. This is a huge help as both wives and husbands are working full-time.

A new trend has risen from TikTok. It is called the Boy Moms trend, which parallels the “Girl dads” trend. It all started when one TikTok user, Laura Elizabeth Graham (@lauraelizabethgraham), posted a video of her teaching her son various chores around the house. In this particular video, she was teaching him to cook. The text overlay on the clio reads, “Making sure my son can cook so he’s not impressed by your daughter’s [Stouffer’s] lasagna.”

The caption explained that he would need a homecooked meal from time to time. But, at least he would be able to make it himself. This mom sparked some interest from other parents. They started posting similar videos, and thus a new trend, boy moms, was born.

Read: School Teaches Girls How To Change Tires and Check Oil Levels as Part of New Initiative

More Boy Moms

The internet is now filling up with boy moms all teaching their sons how to live independently. Payal Desai is one of them. She made a whole compilation of videos showing her son doing various things around the house. “So your daughter doesn’t have to deal with a man who was catered to his whole life,” she wrote in the caption.

This trend might have a name now, but in 2016, another mother of boys, Nicoline Paulun, posted videos of her son cooking. She even taught him how to stack the dishwasher. She raised a pretty decent point in her captions. Nicoline wrote, “Remember parents, a man who believes he shouldn’t have to cook or do chores was once a boy who was never taught any better.

Boy stacking dishwasher
Image credit: ABCnews / Nicoline Paulun

She continued, “I really just want to make sure that he grows up to be somebody who is self-sufficient. And that he’s not considered lazy. He’s going to be a good hardworking man. You can’t have that if you don’t start teaching them when they’re young.”

A psychologist even joined in on the boy moms trend. Amber Wardell posted her own video of her teaching her son to cook. She says in the clip, “I’m teaching my son to cook so that he will show up for his future wife as though she’s his partner and not his servant.”

@sensible_amber

This is how we create snobby, entitled men who treat their wives like the help and constantly compare them to mommy dearest. Let’s teach our boys to be self-sufficient, nurturing, compassionate, and supportive. Let’s teach them that their wives do not exist to be their mommies. Most importantly, let’s teach our sons that it is HEALTHY and NORMAL for them to one day leave us and become more attached to their wives than they are to us, and that this is what we WANT for them. Otherwise, we’ll all end up with our boys living with us forever — not because they love us but because no women will have them. They’ll be divorced, lonely and miserable, and we’ll still be cooking their meals. Is this really what we want for our sons? #motherhood #momlife #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodunited #parenting #boymom #biymomculture #toxicboymomculture

♬ original sound – Amber Wardell

Reg Flags

Even though the boy moms trend is intended to help mothers of sons raise men who can do their own cooking and cleaning. However, not everyone is on board with it. The internet has been up in arms and the debate is growing ever stronger. Some mothers are saying the trend is raising some pretty large red flags.

Some parents think that the boy moms who want their sons to cook higher-level cuisines are going to raise men who expect that level of food every night. That would mean their future partner would have to be able to cook the same high-quality food in order to satisfy him.

Keep Reading: Woman stops doing housework after husband tells her she does nothing

Sources

  1. ‘Boy moms’ called out for dubious logic behind teaching their sons to cook.Independent. Olivia Hebert. August 2023.
  2. Mom Teaches Son Chores So He Learns They Are Not ‘Just for Women’.” ABC News. October 15, 2016