Husband-to-Be Wants Everyone at Their Wedding Ceremony to Know His Fiancée Is Not ‘Pure’

A Wedding ceremony is one of the most joyous days in a couple’s lives. However, the process leading up to the big day, and all the planning, can be incredibly stressful. Particularly so, when your future spouse disagrees with your ideas, for a seemingly hurtful reason. It can cause some turmoil in what a blissful time should be.

Reevaluating a Wedding Ceremony

A woman turned to Reddit, subreddit “Off My Chest”, in November, to share that her soon to be husband has made a demand for their Wedding ceremony. She explains that it’s causing her to question their future together.

“Ryan out of nowhere said he was talking to some of his coworkers and thinks that I shouldn’t wear a white dress. This was totally weird to me.” She explained. “Ryan is a very artistic guy, so I figured this was more about how the photos would turn out or something along those lines, but I’m set on wearing white. I told him this and I could see that he was annoyed but he let it go.” The pair were together for 6 years and engaged for 8 months before she began to second guess her decision to have a Wedding ceremony.

Uncovering the Truth

In the post, she goes on to share that an argument took place after he asked to see the dress early. “When I asked him what color he thought I’d be wearing, he told me I should wear red. Again, this was super weird to me. I asked him why I would wear red to our wedding, and he told me that brides only wear white when they are pure.” The post continued. However, according to the future bride, he’s feeling “insecure” because she had been with one other person in life, while he hadn’t been with anyone else.

Calling in Reinforcements

The Reddit user also shared that he’s not particularly religious, so she’s feeling confused about why he’s so adamant. Things took an even more bizarre turn when he attempted to recruit his mother to his side, regarding his bride’s Wedding ceremony dress. She wasn’t on his side, explaining that he too is “impure”. Therefore, he, too, should wear red. Then, “he burst out crying. Ryan is still stating that me wearing white would be deceiving all of the guests and that it is different for guys.” The venting Reddit user disclosed.

“This all has honestly made me question even marrying this man. I don’t know if it’s just because everything is so fresh, but I’m really disgusted by him,” she concluded. “I just needed to rant to anyone about his psycho this is.”

Others Weigh In

Unsurprisingly, many people took the side of the OP, some even encouraging the idea of canceling the Wedding ceremony. “Poor old Ryan. In his late 20s now. Going to find tracking down a virgin for his next partner even trickier. Not to mention getting his mind blown first time he goes to a wedding where the brides is in white, and her children are there.” Commented one user.

“Ryan’s mom is the MVP here.” Said another. Meanwhile a third said, “”It is different for guys.” The go-to excuse for misogynists the world over.” Lastly, one user pointed out that there may have been some standards. “So, he slept with someone before marriage. That isn’t an issue. She slept with someone before marriage. That’s an issue. At what point do we admit it’s not about being ‘pure’. He’s just mad that she slept with someone who WASN’T him. If she’d had sex outside of marriage with only him, I’m willing to bet he wouldn’t care one way or another about a white dress.” They said.

Traditional Wedding Dresses

A Wedding ceremony is meant to be time for cherishing one another and being with all the people you both love. Therefore, it seems trivial to allow the color of the dress to prevent the big day. White dresses have been a way for women in the past to signify their purity. However, customs have changed and while some brides prefer a brightly colored or accented gown, some prefer a more traditional gown. On the other hand, white dresses aren’t the “traditional” choice in many countries including India and China, where a red gown represents good luck and prosperity.

Sadly, misguided feelings, jealousy or other insecurities, and a lack of communication cause the largest disruptions to a Wedding ceremony. People may spend their whole lives dreaming about, then planning the perfect Wedding, but no detail is more important than treating one another with love, support, compassion, and understanding. Including, understanding that everyone has a past, and choosing to make a relationship work anyway.

Calling Off the Wedding Ceremony

In an update, that was much appreciated by Reddit users, the OP ended the relationship with ‘Ryan’. Moreover, adorably asking Reddit users for some advice as to how to dress for their first date in over six years. Though their Wedding ceremony never happened, there is still life after a broken heart. Hopefully, the OP has found some joy, and ‘Ryan’ has been able to reevaluate his unrealistic expectations.

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